“Bullies and Gaslighting”
Gaslighting is a tactic where an individual or entity manipulates a victim into questioning their own reality in order to gain more power. It is a common technique used by abusers, dictators, narcissists, and cult leaders.
When we apply this concept to the behavior of bullies, we see how all the characteristics of bullying work together toward a single ultimate goal—gaslighting. The aim is to craft a “believable” false narrative that turns others against the victim. It is sabotage on every level. Bystanders become numb, their judgment impaired, because they’ve drunk, so to speak, from the Kool-Aid of gaslighting.
The few who bravely stand up for the victim are quickly cut down to size by the gaslighter or their followers. Sadly, gaslighters often have loyal followers, and part of their manipulation is to exploit these supporters. These followers are strategically placed within the bullying scenario to cheer on the bully and pressure anyone who opposes them.
For those of us who recognize that we’re caught in, or witnessing, this kind of bullying, we must decisively put down the cup of Kool-Aid handed to us by the gaslighter and their followers. This is an intentional act of abstinence during manipulation. We must stop drinking from a narrative that’s been twisted beyond recognition. Even the sharpest minds can struggle to differentiate between truth and deliberate distortion. Therefore, the antidote is not always found in seeking out evidence (which may be falsified), but rather in understanding character. It always comes back to character. When in doubt, character is a reliable guide to reality and wisdom.
For example, a victim’s story may seem bleak because it’s been discredited and tainted by the bully—but their character will always tell a different story. In contrast, a bully’s narrative might appear polished and convincing, but their character will always reek of intimidation and threat. Even if the bully’s story seems compelling, aligning yourself with them is a perilous choice. How they treat others is a clear indication of how they will eventually treat you.
Do you know someone who is being bullied? If so, offer them an encouraging wink to show them that you’re not drinking the Kool-Aid served by bullies and gaslighters.
Bullies rely on subtle, manipulative tactics.
Recognizing the game is the first step to ending it.
➡️ [Get your Bully Proofing guide today.]
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